The Adventures of Adoption and Parenthood

By now, you know that I took Prima on a four day trip to San Diego and filled up our love buckets to the brim. It was a bit of a respite from our everyday worries. Now, we are back and reality is still there. Segunda is sick. She is coughing incessantly to the point of vomiting and she has a low grade fever. And I just want somebody else to come and take care of it for me. Husband is away on business. I have to get to work, and the second she gets sick, panic sets in about my job. Will I lose it if I have to stay home with her because I just took 3 days off of work? She's been sick for 6 days. When do we see a doctor? Why can't she stay healthy for longer than a few days? I've been back for a little over 24 hours and I'm already a panicked, tearful, frustrated mess. I don't know what to do for her. I don't know how to make her well. But I got to have a respite from it all. Segunda doesn't get a respite. She lives her life 24 hours a day. She never gets a...

Voldemort splits his soul into 7 pieces and puts them in horcruxes so that he can live forever. But the damage is done. He is only 1/7 of a person and is barely alive. Maybe this is a pity party, maybe it's nerves, maybe it's anxiety, but I feel like I have been divided into many pieces. Just hanging on, clinging to reality and hoping I get it all right somehow. I've posted in some groups on Facebook about the struggle we are having involving our oldest, Prima. And the moms have helped me and supported me. I guess I just need more shoring up, so I'm putting it here too.  Prima is almost 9 years old and never wanted a little sister. There are so many sweet moments with the two of them, I can't keep track. They build forts together, they play Pokemon together, they watch tv together, they build Legos together. And yet, Prima heaps vitriol on her sister in great big buckets of hate. And she heaps vitriol on me. Segunda is having a big surgery on Monday and it in...